So who cares if most of the people around the office can’t drink out of a bottle without getting half the contents all over themselves. It doesn’t make them less of a person. It just makes them half-retarded. Oh, sorry, is ‘retarded’ not politically correct these days? How about just ‘stupid as shit’? So why not give them a birthday or Christmas present they can really enjoy and put to good use? It’s the least you could do for calling them retarded earlier. What? You think I said that word? You’re obviously delusional my friends. Meet me out back behind the monkey bars after gym class and we’ll settle this like real men. Just don’t touch the face. It’s my meal ticket baby!

The BottleBob punches holes in the tops of both plastic and metal bottle caps, allowing you to perfectly fit a straw into the top. No more spills, no more mess. Created by the great minds of Core77, and sold via the Epauletshop (source) for only $21. That’s a small price to pay for not getting soda on your shirt. Trust us.

Source: Core77, Epauletshop (buy here)